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STATELY, PLUMP BUCK MULLIGAN CAME FROM THE STAIRHEAD, bearing a bowl of lather on which a mirror and a razor lay crossed. A yellow dressinggown, ungirdled, was sustained gently behind him by the mild morning air. He held the bowl aloft and intoned: …

Oh, fuck it. Read the rest on Project Gutenberg.

I’ve never read Ulysses, and at this rate, I probably never will. Still though, as Sean Hughes says, “Great preface”.